Isaac's Cardiologist Appointment

I can't believe it has been almost 4 years since Isaacs heart surgery. He is doing great. We went to the cardiologist today. He was such a big boy, he had a chest x-ray, and he sat and did all that the technician told him to, and well. Then we went for an EKG and he did great with that to. He even helped out.

Then the cardiologist came in. He said that Isaac looks great from a cardiology stand point. The hole is healed, and he is doing awesome. He said we don't need to come back for a year and 5 months! July 2009! That will be the 5th anniversary of his surgery.I am very proud of my boy, he did great today.

Quote of the Day:

"Tag You're It Mama!"
-Isaac after I slapped Kara's butt.

Isaac loves to play tag, we run back and forth tagging each other and running away and chasing. It is great fun.

Quote of the Day:

The first and most basic task required of a minister...is to clarify the immense confusion which can arise when people enter this new internal world [of the heart]. It is a painful fact indeed to realize how poorly prepared most Christian leaders prove to be when they are invited to be spiritual leaders in the true sense.

Most of them are used to thinking in terms of large-scale organization, getting people together in churches, schools and hospitals, and running the show as a circus director. They have become unfamiliar with, and even somewhat afraid of the deep and significant movements of the spirit. I am afraid that in a few decades the Church will be accused of having failed in its most basic task: to offer men creative ways to communicate with the source of human life.

In this context pastoral conversation is not merely a skillful use of conversational techniques to manipulate people into the Kingdom of God, but a deep human encounter in which a man is willing to put his own faith and doubt, his own hope and despair, his own light and darkness at the disposal of others who want to find a way through their confusion and touch the solid core of life.

Teaching in this context does not mean telling the old story over and over again, but the offering of channels through which people can discover themselves, clarify their experiences and find niches in which the Word of God can take hold.

Henri Nouwen: Wounded Healer: written in1979 (but sounds like it was written yesterday)

deer hit by car

this is not gory, this deer launches into the air and is never seen again! I wish that my car had that type or aerodynamics.

Quote of the Day:

"Blessed are the poor, for God kicked 'em"
-Isaac trying to learn his memory verse from the sermon on the mount

P.S. He did get it right, but sometimes he says the old way first because we laugh.

Tim Hawkins - Cletus Take the Reel

I know, I know everyone is posting this, but I cried and laughed too hard NOT to post this.

Quote of the Day

What I began to realize in Colorado is that there are a lot of orphans with a dad at home. He hasn’t walked out to deal drugs but he walks out to sell pharmaceuticals or promote a CD. Dad’s too busy climbing the corporate ladder to climb a jungle gym. Dad’s too busy kicking the competition’s tail to kick the soccer ball in the back yard. Dad’s too busy kissing his bosses butt to kiss foreheads goodnight. He’s too busy watching his church grow to watch his girl’s first ballet.
Shaun Groves

Quote of the Day

"The remarkable things about fearing God is that when you fear God, you fear nothing else; whereas if you do not fear God, you fear everything else."
-Oswald Chambers; The Highest Good

Happy 4th Isaac!

A New Way to Do Youth Ministry

I am kinda bummed out today. I was supposed to go to Jackson to meet with a friend and fellow youth pastor for lunch, but the snow was too much for the nearly 2 hour drive. There was school closings and accidents everywhere this morning, and Isaac had a small seizure, so it is a good thing that I did not go, but I was looking forward to talking with Ben.

Ben really started me thinking about doing youth ministry in new ways. He says, "There are still ways to do youth ministry that have not been discovered yet." This gives us permission to try new things and styles of youth ministry. I have been doing some experimental styles of youth ministry, getting away from the educational, lecture, entertainment style of church models, more of BEING church instead of just DOING church. We have seen some really awesome results the past year so far. We have made some really strong connections with students, and seen much life change.

I have been reading the prophets of the Old Testament and asking the question, "What ticked God off?" I am finding the answer is far different than the one we heard in church growing up. We heard a lot of "Don't drink, dance, or chew, or go with any girls that do" style of Christianity that defined the earlier Industrial revolution, and World War II generation. Those generations found that many of those activities usually involved hanging out with the wrong crowd and straying from God. So I hand it to there generation for trying to keep people on track with God.

Things are a bit different now. The church focused too long on this model of "Christianity means you DON'T DO _____________." Fill in the blank yourself, we all know the jargon the church has become known for. Even today, drinking is a huge issue for the Southern Baptists, and many churches and pastors are turning from the SB denomination for there condemnation of drinking.
What really ticked God off was when there were people who were oppressed and God's people either did nothing for them, or took advantage of them. What really cheesed God off in the Old Testament was when his people started to get proud of their own efforts and not give God the credit that he deserved. What really made God mad, was when people worshiped pieces of wood or metal instead of him. And what really really cheesed him off was when God's people assembled together regularly and did nothing but go through motions.

Interesting.

Nolan is Cute

Nolan is a cutey. Thanks to G.G. for sending me this photo of him.

Reason To Live

whoa
http://yahwehssong.com/

Life with Isaac part 4

Life with Isaac is great and rewarding. I love when I leave for work, how he watches me out the window until I am not in view anymore. I love when he comes up to me and says, "Piggyback wide pwease." I love the really cute things he says like, when he handed Nolan a toy that he dropped, Isaac said, "Thanks me." voicing what he wanted Nolan to say, but not sure what pronoun to use. I love his hugs, cuddles, kisses, and love. I love how he runs and laughs through the house, constantly.

With all the good stuff, there is difficult stuff too. That is how life works. We have had to watch Isaac go through some painful things medically. It was really hard to do, but he is so amazing, he never hardened up, he remained the sweet loving Isaac that we know.

Us adults are not so good at that. We experience pain and we callous up for protection reasons. We raise barriers and keep others out not willing to risk getting hurt. We "toughen" up, shut up, and keep a stiff upper lip not showing those around us who we really are, and what we are really feeling, we do not want to risk rejection, pain, or mockery.

We are so addicted to conditional approval because it is something that is not a handout, it is something deserved. But with all these conditions for the approval of those around us we tire, and then comes the show, then comes the false self, then comes the barriers we put up to protect the real us, the real us that we want to hide because of its weakness and neediness.

But this weak needy self, the real self, is the one whom God loves with NO conditions. We often accuse the church and Christians of being hypocritical, the word hypocrite means actor, one who wears a mask. It was used to refer to those who pretended they were better off than they were, that they did not need help, that they were not weak. I think that we all are a bit hypocritical, whether we are a part of a church or not.

I am trying to learn from Isaac, that it is alright to be who we are, it is alright to be weak and needy as long as I go to God for strength and fulfillment. I am learning to not pretend, to just be me without reservation. That is hard to do because if I present the real me and it is rejected, than that is REAL rejection of the REAL me, not rejection of some false person that wasn't really me in the first place.

But I have to be willing to accept REAL rejection because I should not be looking to those around me for fulfillment, but looking to God, and resting in the fact that he made me to be me, and that is the me that he loves and accepts and already approves of because of Jesus.

Thanks to Ben for this clip of Gabe Lyons in an interview. I have yet to read his book, but it is on the Amazon wish list.

Life with Isaac Part 3

No television. I never thought two words could be so revolutionary. But in America, television is a way of life, it is a necessity, it is like food and water. People can't picture life without a television. I hear things like, "NO TELEVISION, well what do you do then?!" I must admit that at first it was a bit tough, I really like the show 24, and PBS's Saturday morning cooking shows. (I am a dork)

We started to notice that TV had a negative influence on Isaac, not in the crazy sheltered Baptist kind of way, but in the background noise was too much for his Sensory Integration Dysfunction to handle. He would start to get really "floppy" and rag-dollish, and trip over lots of things, and not have a good focus. The background noise of a television made it so that he could not focus on things like walking, eating, drinking, playing, and other normal functions very well. It is like two people trying to have two different conversations with you at the same time.

Our entertainment center is now filled with games, blankets, craft things, and a laptop for the occasional sesame street DVD for Isaac when he wants some sit down time. We have adapted to this new way of, life well. The only trouble is when we go to other people's houses who have television on, Isaac gets floppy and disoriented, and people just don't understand why something as normal and common place as a television could have this effect on him. I find that when I go over a house with the television on, I am now finding it hard to focus and concentrate too. It is loud, and I get headaches, and I can't focus.

I don't think that television is evil, or even wrong. I think that it can be an addiction like alcohol or caffeine, or sugar. But life has been really good with this change, a change that I may not have considered if Isaac had been born "normal" and not "handicapped" by this worlds standards. I find that I have no time for television even if we had one, we are too busy playing and reading and eating dinner as a family and talking and having relationship that I think many people use TV as an easy substitute for relationship.

Relationship takes work and let's face it sometimes it can be easier to sit down and stare at a box that will entertain us and call it family time that interact. Sometimes I find myself thinking, "I am really tired today, maybe I can pop in a DVD for Isaac and just sit together." Sometimes we do that, and sometimes I make myself get up off the couch and get onto the floor and play and interact with my boys. I am finding that the latter is more rewarding as a family, and in the end I never regret it, no matter how tired I am.

My brother and sister in-law bought us a frame with a saying on it that was so appropriate for life, and is becoming more and more my motto for living, "Everyday is a Gift." Everyday with each other is a gift, every breath is a gift, every second on the floor playing with my boys is a gift. At any time, God may call Isaac, Nolan, Kara, or myself home to be with Himself, so I must cherish the time that I do have now.

We almost lost Isaac a handful of times in his lifetime, when that happens, it tends to put things in perspective, the challenging part is keeping that perspective fresh and a way of living, and not sitting wasting life and precious time with each other by not treating each second as a gift. I pray a prayer every day to help keep this perspective, "God thank you for the time I have had so far with ________ (insert family member name here). I know that you could take them home today, so thank you for the time that we have had, help us to cherish it."

Life With Isaac Part 2

The video posted below is an amazing ministry that a group called Young Life had going to kids with disabilities. The lady in the video, Elizabeth Thompson was fired from staff on November 30th. The reason for the firing was as Tony Jones writes:

"she refused to tell developmentally disabled teenagers that they are depraved and separated from God. You see, Elizabeth ran YL’s Capernaum Ministry in Durham/Chapel Hill. She was presented with the Non-Negotiables statement from YL (an earlier version) and asked if she could assent with all point in the 9-page document. She said no. She said that the kids with whom she works cannot understand “separation from God” as it is dictated in the penal substitutionary theory of the atonement. So she was fired."

This is an interesting topic that our Jr. High team just discussed at our last meeting. Can Jr. High students grasp the idea of salvation and repentance and substitutionary atonement and the kingdom of God? My answer to them was, "I don't know." These are massive ideas that my mind cannot fully grasp. The fundamental evangelicals voted last year to raise the age of accountability from eight to ten. So that means that before the age of ten, children are not accountable for their sins.

That is weird to me to have that hard of a doctrine. Luke 12 says,
"The servant who knows what his master wants and ignores it, or insolently does whatever he pleases, will be thoroughly thrashed. But if he does a poor job through ignorance, he'll get off with a slap on the hand. Great gifts mean great responsibilities; greater gifts, greater responsibilities!

God knows what each is able to grasp and comprehend. I believe it is our responsibility as adults for our children to be the best gardener we can. We have to provide the best environment for our kids to grow in God, at home, church, school, wherever. Do everything within your power to raise your kids in an environment of God awareness. If our homes are proper greenhouses and we are proper gardeners, good results are the most likely outcome, even though it is never guaranteed.

Is Isaac capable of understanding salvation and human depravity and atonement? I have no idea, but he will grow up in an atmosphere and environment of God awareness, prayer, Bible stories, love, knowledge of right and wrong, as much as possible. I think Young Life will be much poorer without Elizabeth and her ministry to the "disabled" kids.

Life with Isaac Part 1

This is a series that I have been wanting to post for some time now. So here goes.

My son Isaac who just turned 4 years old is a miracle. He is the most amazing little boy in the whole world. He has taught me so much about what it means to be a father, a Christian, and a man of God. As many of you know, my son has had a long track record of medical difficulties. I won't go into too much detail so I will highlight some of the things:

Isaac has a chromosome deletion on the 6q end of the chromosome arm. What does that mean? That means that some of Isaac's DNA and genetic blueprint was missing when he was being formed in the womb. This resulted in some of the following issues:

Heart defect that led to open heart surgery at 6 months of age.
Macular scarring on the eyes, results are to be determined.
Dysmorphic features of the brain resulting in Epilepsy and mental and developmental delays
Microcephaly, Sensory Integration Dysfunction, Failure to Thrive, etc...

This does not define Isaac though. Isaac as I know him is a happy healthy boy who loves to play, get piggyback rides, cuddle, go to Sunday School, talk on the phone with anyone, pray, read his Bible story books, listen to Bob and Larry sing Fishers of Men over and over, give kissed and hugs, run, jump, go to McDonalds and eat a cheeseburger, swing on the swing, go down slides, climb on anything that will or will not hold him, sing, chase someone and get chased by someone, bounce and throw a ball, visit family, pretend, help out, cook, and so much more.

This world labels Isaac as handicapped. As I live and learn with Isaac, I am noticing that he is not as handicapped as what the world labels "normal." Isaac lives with absolutely no insecurities or fears or cares about anything other than being who God made him to be, and that is what we just defined above, the Isaac who loves to walk up to a stranger and say hi, the Isaac who will start to pray right in the middle of a conversation "Father we just come up to you...", the Isaac who will run into the middle of a dark room not caring about anything other than playing, the Isaac who will start to sing and dance in the middle of a room without caring who is watching.

David Crowder writes in his book, Praise Habit:
"We instinctively knew what it was to praise something It's always been in us. We were created for it. It;s a part of who we are...but as adults we become self-conscious and awkward. Something gets lost. I think we do it to each other... The moment I see a hill painted in greenest of grass, with long infinite blades waltzing in the wind, and make up my mind to sprint to the top, to give myself to gravity and let it roll me down, I hear, "Dork!" shouted from behind me somewhere and I stop. This is what we have done to one another."

I believe that I am more handicapped that my son. My insecurities stop me from being who God made me to be, from doing what God wants me to do, from praising how God wants me to praise. Isaac doesn't care about what others think of him, he just does what he does, he just is Isaac, without reservation. What if all of us could live life from that perspective? What if we loved, lived and laughed without a care of what others thought, just our Father in heaven? I am trying to learn from Isaac, and I have been making some slow progress. I hope that Isaac will have patience with me as I learn to let go of insecurity and live as he does.

Younglife Capernaum Video

Nolan's first time in the swing

he didn't like it unless it was really slow, like barely moving slow. He would cry if we actually swung him. But he ended up falling asleep in it for a while and getting a good nap.

Nolan had fun too